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Saturday, April 2, 2011

1 year ago...

Sweet Sadie baby is 1 year old today. I almost can't believe how fast this last year went. It's been 6 months since I've posted on this blog and haven't really had the time to keep up with it, but wanted to tonight so I could write my 2nd "milestone letter" to Sadie and am not organized enough to put it on paper in the baby book yet.

In the last 6 months, we've had so many firsts- Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's, Valentine's Day and now finally Sadie's 1st birthday. We did our best to not go overboard, especially since people point out that she won't remember it anyway. But her firsts are also firsts for us, so I want to make them special for us all. We had a little BBQ birthday party with her today. I made too many cupcakes ;) and I made Sadie her own little smash cake to eat. She ate/smashed it all. It was cute and funny. She partied hard as you can see in this picture. :)

Dear Sadie,

You are 1 today. You are a smart, precocious and funny little girl. You love books. I love that you love books. Your daddy and I read many books to you everyday. You point at the pictures and lift the flaps and turn the pages. You love to eat. You love to feed yourself with a spoon or with your fingers. Sometimes that gets very very messy. Just yesterday you dumped a half cup of squash on your head. You still love your green foods. Green beans, spinach, peas- always a hit. You even eat meat too. You love cheesy eggs and your daddy cooks you one almost every morning. You have had chicken and turkey too. You definitely have a sweet tooth, and we let you have small tastes of the sweet things that we eat, because we love you and so we are willing to share. And good thing we are, because when you want to eat something- oh boy, watch out. You have been known to swipe a whole slice of pizza off our plates if we aren't watching close enough. You love to dance. You love music and shaking your little booty to the beat. When you hear a song you smile and you dance. You are standing up all by yourself now. You've been able to do it since you were 10+ months old, but just recently you are getting more brave about it. You took your first steps about a month ago, but last night you walked more all by yourself without us getting you started. I bet it will be just days before you're running all over the place. You can say lots of different words but you definitely know these- Dada, mama, dog, duck, ball, bird. If you hear a dog bark or see a picture of a dog, you'll say "dog". Maybe someday we will have to get you a dog since you love them so much already. You are sleeping much much better now, which makes your daddy and I very happy. Sometimes you still wake up at night, but most of the time you sleep from bedtime all the way until morning. You have two top teeth and 4 teeth on the bottom! You give hugs, you wave bye-bye and you blow kisses at your daddy when it is time to go night night. You are a very loving girl and enjoy playing with other kids, especially your cousin Haven and your friend Jude, who are the two you see the most often. You are very social and will laugh and smile at all the people who talk to you while out and about.

You are still and always will be my sweet baby, but now you are growing into a beautiful little girl. You fit perfectly into our little family and I am so proud to be your mama.

Happy first birthday Sadie B. Your first year was filled with love and health and fun and many happy memories. I wish you many many many more to come.

I love you forever and always,

Mommy

Saturday, October 2, 2010

6 month Wrap-up

After almost 6 months of maternity leave and 2 5-week long trips to Illinois to hang with family, I have crossed over and become a working mom. It was a big adjustment to resume the life I'd led before Sadie entered my world and then again, it wasn't. The night before my first day back, I slept only a handful of hours. Sadie woke up constantly, and I woke up constantly. My anxiety about being away from my girl longer than ever before must have rattled us both. But no matter what, that morning came. And after loads of advice and planning to Caleb and lots of kisses, I got in the car and drove to work. I walked in the door to hellos and welcome backs and was it hard to leaves? and with tears in my eyes, said yes and thanks and that was that. And Caleb fed her green beans at 10am, which was not in our plan (at all), but that was okay too, because the torch had been passed and he was in charge now. I think that was the hardest part of it, the relinquishing control... the knowing that things would happen that I would not be there for... that I didn't get to spend every moment with her, leading her through this world and experiencing it again through her eyes. But I do get to do that, just lunch hours, nights and weekends. The work part wasn't hard, it was like riding a bike. I've had that job for 5 years, it was a part of who I was and so it was not difficult to reestablish as a part of who I am. I am glad that I didn't have to start a new job, because that would have been REALLY hard. And I've been busy with lots of casting and shows and projects and movies and so the days go pretty fast. And I've had some run ins with some big celebs on set. I do like my job, but I'm not going to lie- I wish it was more balanced. Maybe someday.

I still can't believe how fast time is going. My girl is 6 months old today. I used my mad cake decorating skills (I took a class while I was home in Illinois, note- not really that great of skills, but I'm trying haha) to make her a 1/2 birthday cake. CB's in Europe on tour again, and my mom is coming tomorrow to visit. I have no idea what to have us be for Halloween and the holidays seem to be practically upon us.

I thought it might be nice to write a little letter to Sadie on her milestone birthdays and put them in her baby book to read when she's older, so she can see what she was into and doing, etc. I don't have pen and paper readily handy and this day is almost over, so I'm sticking this one on here, that way I can transpose it later. Warning, it will probably be cheesy.

Dear Sadie,

Today you are 6 months old. Your Daddy and I love you so very much and are so glad that you are a part of our family. You make my heart smile just by looking at you. You are very smart and very strong. You can sit by yourself, you scoot (almost crawling) all around a room, oftentimes backwards, you drink out of a cup, you roll both directions. You've always liked to stand and are starting to pull yourself up, when there is something to grab on to. You like going to the park to swing and to play in the sand. You are eating solids and always want to hold the spoon yourself. You've eaten rice cereal, carrots, green beans, peas and bananas. I think your favorite is green beans, but bananas are a close second. You are not as fond of carrots. You love taking baths and you will kick your feet and splash your hands. You like to chew on your rubber ducky. You like to chew on most things actually. Probably because you have 2 teeth already. You love music, listening to and dancing with, singing, playing the tambourine with daddy (*video below). We call you Sadie B, Princess of the Flowers, Sadie Potatie (your cousin Stella came up with that). You are a happy baby and are full of smiles and giggles. People constantly stop us while we're out and comment on how beautiful you are and your eyes, especially, and you always have a smile for them. You are very photogenic, which is good, because we take lots of pictures. You love your kitties, especially grabbing their ears, or a fistful of fur. So far, they like you too and tolerate quite well this occasional tug. You sometimes put up a fight when you're sleepy and you still wake me up every couple hours all night long, but we're going to work on that. You are very loved by so many people. You are a very special little girl and I'm so glad that I am your mom.

I love you forever and always.

~Mommy

(wow, I've never signed anything Mommy before... weird!)

Here's the video of Sadie playing the tambourine.

Monday, July 12, 2010

Sadie lady

Today was an awesome day. The 3 of us went down to the get some free stuff from his record label's clothing store and it's about an hour drive. Sadie slept all the way there, and slept all the way back. The girl that hates her car seat at times- was an absolute joy to travel with! We started thinking road trips... probably we'll just do the plane ride to Illinois and the short car rides involved with that and call it a day. haha No need to press our luck.Anyway, so we had time to sing in the car and talk and laugh and act a little like our former selves and it was great. And the label was pretty generous and I was able to get some jeans called Sadie lady skinny jeans. And they fit amazing (obviously still a size larger than before, but I'll take it for now) and are a color I don't have in my post pregnancy closet yet.

We're almost all settled into our new place... just in time to leave again. haha We're heading back to visit family again and then CB will be starting a new tour in a couple weeks. This one will be a challenge because I'll actually have some time in LA on my own with the babe for the first time... and he'll be out for my birthday this year. He's been around for my last 12 birthdays and I'm a sap and can't imagine not having him there, but it'll be fine and go quick and soon enough he'll be home, right?

And a quick update on my own little Sadie lady:

She turned 3 months old a week and a half ago. She's overall a happy baby, but as I mentioned before definitely hates the car seat sometimes. She's laughing a lot now- especially if you lift her up over your head. She has also rolled over several times. The first time was last week on July 6th (date for me to remember to add to baby book later) and that day she rolled belly to back 4 or 5 times in a row. Then I got out the computer to video it and she started watching herself on the screen and no more rolling. Today she rolled again a few times for the first time in a week. I finally got her rolling over on video, but it was only in like 3 steps and not at all smooth like she was doing, so I won't post it (3 steps took like 45 seconds for the whole roll! haha). She's nowhere close to rolling back to belly, but I figure that seems like the harder one, so no worries there. She likes to take baths and she'll kick her feet in the water. She doesn't like getting dressed after the bath at all and will almost always scream and cry until she's totally dressed and in your arms. We are trying out a "flexible" schedule routine, which basically means: Wake and eat, play time, nap time. This is definitely easier to do at home when I can drop everything and feed her, but we do our best and I watch her cues and go with the flow.

I still look at her and think sometimes- Wow, you are really real. And you are mine. The connection I feel to this little girl is so intense and so real and so surreal, it catches me off guard all the time. If you haven't tried this motherhood thing yet, I highly recommend it... but just be ready to be blown away (or maybe it's just me).

I took some pics of Sadie on the day she turned 3 months old. She was giving a lot of love to the camera that time- very cooperative.

Sadie on the 4th of July- She was going through a "squealy" talking phase. That's the face she's making- "aaaah"

Our little fam.

(I think it's hilarious that we're all doing "big eyes")

It's late and I'm too tired to re-read this and see if it makes sense... Hope so!

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Milestones

Lots of changes going on over here...

Sadie is growing growing growing! She's grown more than 5 lbs since we left the hospital. We had her 2 (and 1/2) month checkup on Monday and she is now 11 lbs 4 oz. and 23.5" long. She is in the 76th percentile for length and the 45th percentile for weight. If you compare her weight to other girls her age that are also her height, she's in the 5th percentile. She is our little skinny minnie I guess. But she's growing really steadily (about an ounce a day!) so I'm thinking the height part is just a fluke. I mean, how did CB and I produce a tall baby ? haha

The other change is really great... but also bittersweet in a way. The pediatrician said that we can turn back in the apnea monitor that she's worn every night since we got home from the hospital. At first the monitor was a source of frustration for us. Sadie doesn't have sleep apnea (thank goodness!) but she was born with laryngomalacia, meaning the cartilage in her neck/throat/larynx area was immature and too soft. When she'd cry really hard, the cartilage would collapse and she wouldn't be able to get a breath in, causing her to turn dusky blue in the hospital. So in order for the hospital to discharge her, they required that we go home with this apnea monitor (and the guy was really really late delivering it, which is why we didn't get home until midnight!). So anyway, the doctors told us that she would just eventually grow out of this as her cartilage grew stronger, probably by the time she was 18 months. So the monitor was frustrating because it was set to go off if she didn't take a breath for 20 seconds, or if her heart rate was to go down past 70 bpm, and we knew that neither of those were her problem. Because she was small (6 lbs 5 oz) when we left the hospital, we had to use these sticky electrodes for the first month, which would become unstuck and cause false alarms (and really really loud too) off and on throughout the night when her foot would catch one and she'd kick them off. Once she was 8 lbs, we switched over to the belt and the false alarms went away. Around then, I realized that this monitor is actually very comforting. I know that she is breathing, all night long, when she is hooked to it. I don't wake up and check her like I've heard lots of other new moms do (or if I do, I just glance and make sure the monitor is on and working, rather than stare at her belly). Last night, for the first time, I didn't put the belt on and I woke up to check her a few times, but I made it through and slept decent enough, I guess. So I am ecstatic that my baby is deemed "healthy" enough to get off the monitor, but can't help but be just a little nervous about not having my safety alarm.

Sadie hooked up to her monitor on her sleep wedge. She always kicks off her cover too, it's really funny. (She is not using the wedge anymore, since she is starting to wiggle more at night)

The last change is we're moving apartments. We found a 2 bedroom just down the street that allows cats and is only $50 more a month that what we pay now. It isn't super fancy, but does have dark hardwood floors. It is exciting and bittersweet too- we've lived in our current apartment for 4 years - that is the longest I have lived anywhere since graduating high school. I'm excited to decorate Sadie's room and we'll have a dining area!! We haven't had a dining table since we moved out of Hollywood. I'm looking forward to family dinners with Sadie in her high chair and us at the table. Yay! I'll post pics when we get all moved in.

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Fairy Princess baby doll

I seriously teared up when I saw this picture for the first time.

Makaya went above and beyond on this one. She found the doll bed. She found the perfect spot in my mom's backyard and made it resemble something out of a storybook. She burned her finger hot-glueing ribbon rosettes when I cluelessly handed her the headband and shrugged my shoulders (sorry about that, kaya :( ). And she also warned me just in the nick of time that Sadie was waking, and I was able to dive and catch her as she rolled off the back of the bed.

I plan to blow this one up big. There are a couple more here.

I totally am jumping ahead here... but spending the last few weeks at my mom's has made me think of my mom when she had little baby me and how someday Sadie will be in my shoes, looking at her childhood memories. I looked at my baby book (wow, I need to get on Sadie's... all we did so far was a footprint stamp), looked through my newborn photo album (she is a pretty good mix of the two of us, I'd say), and went through all the clothes that mom saved of mine. ...Anyway, I can't help but think that future Sadie is going to love this picture and that makes me very happy.

Monday, May 24, 2010

Want a new cardi?

My friend Mari (who I collaborated with last fall, so many of you have met her/seen her gorgeous stuff) has new designs for spring and this cool cardigan is being given away.